“Stand on the whale, see the world and accept your greatness”. An incredibly well written analogy and thought provoking letter, by Dr Suzanne Brown.

A Letter to Me and A Letter to You.

 You by your very design are worthy of being loved. You will believe that it has to be earned, and occupy your time collecting the badges and the accolades, until one day when having your own child you will realise it was your birthright.

 You will take for granted how miraculous it is that you are even alive. That you are a miracle. The odds were one in four trillion.  

 You will be capable of greatness and yet sometimes the most difficult and daring thing for you to do will be to lead an ordinary life.

 You will realise that in accepting and confronting your limitations, your rough and imperfect edges, painful as this may be, this will free you up in ways that you did not know were possible. You’ll also start to be able to set real limits with others once embracing this part of yourself.

 You will see that the source of your creativity flows within you, and when you are in communication with this, allowing yourself to daydream and play, creativity will bubble up from the depths. You will forget how to play and need to be reminded of this. Play more.

 You will learn there is a lot to learn from improv. That life is improv and the better you get at saying “yes and…” the more likely you are to get to places that never would have been possible with just “yes”.

 Know the tale about what it means to be “Standing on a whale fishing for minnows” and know it early – You will get consumed by the daily necessities and monotony, counting down the hours and meeting the deadlines, failing to meet the deadlines, creating self-imposed deadlines…the fishing. Then, every now and again, you will find yourself in awe about the beauty of life, your insignificance in it, the way time is finite, and you will realise you are stood on a whale. A second later you will be back to the fishing. Try to have lots of whale moments.

 You will suffer and through the suffering will forge a greater knowing of yourself and others if you are willing to face what causes you heartache. You’ll find it will often show you what you treasure as much as it will show you pain.


 You will learn there is a difference between being looked at and being seen. The former comes with judgement, the latter comes with intimacy and closeness. You will learn that the latter can be more terrifying but also liberating.

 You will learn that not everyone will like you. This will sting. You will try hard to make it not so and exhaust yourself in the process. When you accept the parts of you that can be envious, jealous and furious with others, it will soften the sting and welcome you back into the fold of human experience. Woven into these accepting parts is the freedom to be authentically you.


Dr Suzanne Brown is a Clinical Psychologist and Psychotherapist. She lives with her partner and son in Warwickshire.

Dr. Brown is the founder of Emotionally Connected; a psychological consultancy service that is pioneering a new approach, bridging clinical and performance psychology, and central to this is developing the person behind the performance. She works on the understanding that we bring ourselves to everything we do; in relationships, parenting, business and more.


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